Monday, November 29, 2010


Sorry that it's been three months. I'm not the best blogger. I'm more a Tweeter as I've already said.

I did want to share my good news, though. For those of you who have been waiting for a sequel to "Dirty Business" your wait will be over on 2/1/11.

Tentatively titled "Business of Pleasure", it centers around Chloe's best friend, Carmen and Sean's best friend, Drew. They are explosive together! Carmen is sassy and sexual and Drew is sexy and reserved but oh, when you get him in the bedroom, he is a sexual dynamo!

This book is IR. Carmen is from the Dominican Republic and Sean is Caucasian.

For Sean and Chloe fans, you will get a bit more insight into their relationship. The story starts at their wedding. It makes me happy that they have their happy ending (Ha Ha).

Anyway, more updates when they come along. I probably won't blog for a while because now the edits begin.

Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Total Hotness Tuesday

I'm going to let the pictures speak for themselves...


Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Dorchester to their Authors

The following was posted on one of the loops that I receive daily. The forwarder wishes to remain anonymous but she did say the many established authors have left Dorchester. Also, Dorchester did not say this e-mail was not to be forwarded. I'm just posting this now and I'll put my two cents in at a later time.

Dear Anonymous Author:

Don, Chris & I have been working to contact as many people as we could
before sending out a blanket announcement regarding some of the new format
changes many of you have already read about. Unfortunately, news broke
online before anticipated.

Given the many changes in the publishing industry over the last several
years, Dorchester has made the decision to more tightly focus its
distribution models so that we may fully capitalize on the most profitable
emerging technologies.

Starting with September titles, we will be moving from mass-market to trade
paperback format. This will delay new releases roughly 6-8 months, but it
will also open many new and more efficient sales channels.

And we're pleased to say all titles will be available in ebook format as
originally scheduled. The substantial growth we've seen in the digital
market in such a short period-combined with the decline of the mass-market
business-convinced us that we needed to fully focus our resources in this
segment sooner rather than later.

Dorchester has always been known as a company ahead of the curve and willing
to take risks. As bookstores are allocating the bulk of their capital to the
digital business, it only makes sense that we do the same. Everyone keeps
hearing that the industry has to change if it's going to survive. We're
excited to be at the forefront of that change and will continue to keep you
posted on further developments.

And to help answer some of the questions you might have:

When will my book be coming out?

Ebook editions will be out in the month the mass-market was originally
scheduled. The trade paperback will follow roughly 6-8 months after. We
have tentatively rescheduled many of the Sept.-Jan. titles through June or
July 2011. But we're still working on books scheduled farther out.

Why the delay?

Some of the delay will be in reformatting the typeset mass-market so that it
better fits a trade size. But most of the extra time is so that the sales
force we're working with will have a chance to sell books in to the
accounts. Just like mass-market, stores will be placing their orders about
4-6 months before the books are printed.

I read in an article that these are print-on-demand. Does that mean they
won't be offered to the general market?

We've partnered with Ingram Publishing Services, who will be selling in
books to libraries, Borders, B&N, Books a Million and all other retail and
wholesale accounts that we've called on previously. But by having many more
sales reps, we'll also be able to target accounts, such as many independent
stores, who have not ordered our books in the past. Just as for mass-market
books, stores will place their orders and we will print to fill them. Books
will be on the shelves for readers to browse. However, using
print-on-demand technology, we will not have to keep as many books in
inventory incurring warehousing fees. Books will be available for reorder
just as they are now, but we will only have to print as many copies as we
need instead of a minimum of 5000.

What happens to backlist titles?

We're currently in the process of changing warehouses, but once set,
reorders will continue as normal. When a book goes out of stock, we will
make the determination of whether to reprint-just as we do now. Reprints
will most likely be in trade format, though we haven't completely ruled out
the possibility of some staying in mass-market.

Thank you for your patience and support as we make this transition.


Leah Hultenschmidt
Editorial Director
Dorchester Publishing

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

RWA 2010 Recap PART ONE

Hello to all my friends out in the blogosphere!

I know it's been a while but as I've said before, if you really want to keep up with me, you can find me on Twitter.

It's been a busy time since I last blogged. This whole last week I was in Florida attending my very first RWA Conference. I've been to RT several times but never really gave a thought to to attending this conference which I now know was a mistake.

I'd first like to thank all the staff at RWA who worked their asses off to put this together after the flood at the Opryland Hotel. They did an awesome job.

But really? Mother fucking Florida in the middle of mother fucking July? It was like the Devil's armpit there. I told several people that God had abandoned us. No way He could live there and He was punishing us. Still, as long as you stayed inside the hotel, all was well. But DAMN! It didn't even cool off at night.

That being said, everything came together amazingly.

My CP Tricia and I decided to attend this year because our other CP Viola Estrella was nominated for her first (and in no way last) RITA award. Unfortunately, she didn't win but still, it was a landmark nomination because it was the very first e-book to be nominated. A fact that I think RWA grossly undervalued. In my opinion, there should have been more fanfare. But whatever. Her name and her book will be remembered for that.

The thing that made me most happy though, is that I got to see La Nora. Of course, in true Monica fashion, I spit on her. Yeah. I have a tendency to spit sometimes when I talk and that was one of those times.


Nora gave a GREAT keynote speech. She talked about what it took to be a writer. My favorite quote and one that I'm going to get made into T-shirts was 'Ride the Hard.' My mind went to oh so many bad yet delicious places! If you get a chance to get a copy of this speech, do it. I was so inspired. Tricia and I came home determined to ride our hards all the way to New York. I'm working on putting a synopsis and querying agents.

And writing. Most of all writing.

I also met some AWESOME people. Of course there was Jessa Slade and Delilah Marvelle. These lovely ladies are kindness personified and my best night was sitting at the pool with them as well as Vi and Trish and talking shop. Career planning, publishing, the future of our industry. It was one of the best conversations. Ever.

I got a shitload of books. Like ten times more than RT. I swear, when I see books, my brain shuts down and goes into MUST HAVE mode. I grabbed everything I could. I have gotten more books in the past three months than I can read this year. But I'm going to try. Really hard. Though I will have to fit reading in around my writing and not the other way around.

I saw Nalini Singh. We had a room on the same floor and I swear she thought I was stalking her. I wasn't. This time.

I also think I freaked out Carolyn Jewel. I follow her on Twitter and when you read someone's tweets it's like you know them. So when I met her at RomCon I kind of approached her like I knew her. I didn't. But she was so sweet and lovely that when I saw her again at RWA we were BFFs. (Not really. At least not anywhere but in my own mind.) As such, I talked to her as though we were best gal pals. She humored me. But I saw the glint of "this bitch is crazy" in her eyes but I promise her I'm not going to be hiding in her bushes. I'm in CO, she's in CA. At least until RT next year.


I was happy to get an ARC of her book though. It was like a stroke of luck because they were all gone and then one got returned and I snatched that shit up.

But the real highlight of my trip was sitting next to Donald 'Mother Fucking' Maass at the RITA awards. Another thing for which I need to thank Delilah and Jessa. Oh, and he's hot. I'd never seen a picture of him but wow. He was not what I had expected. And I did take Keri Stevens's advice not to lick him and thereby commit career suicide.
Random bits:
-Lisa Kleypas is gorgeous in person.
-Teresa Medeiros is funny as hell.
-Cynthia Eden continues to be the sweetest person on the planet and she told me she loves me. The feeling is mutual.

Okay. That's it for this installment. Next time more about the week and why RWA is better than RT. If you're a writer.

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

RomCon 2010

Hello Blogosphere!

This weekend was a big one here in Denver, CO. The planets aligned to bring a giant slice of awesomeness to our Mile High City. Last weekend was RomCon. It was billed to be the biggest event for romance readers around and I have to say I agree, although there weren't all that many readers there. It was the first year so I wasn't expecting much and my expectation were WAY exceeded.

It's true what they say that writers are readers first and so even though the ration of author to reader seemed like 5:1, it was all good. Especially since I'm a huge fan girl and I got to spend some quality time with some of my favorite authors like Christine Feehan, Jessa Slade, Shannon K. Butcher, Nicole Peeler and the woman I most wanted to see, Nalini Singh.

There was so much opportunity for fans to meet up and spend time with an author. I did the Speed Date an author and people came to talk to me and even if they hadn't read my stuff, we still could have a great conversation about the books we liked and all things romance which I love to do especially since I rarely get the chance to do it.

The most fun I had was doing the Midnight Sexcapades with Delilah Marvelle, Lila DiPasqua, Bridget Midway, Delinda Jasper, K Jones, and a couple others whose names escape me night now. It was a raucous and rowdy night! I had very little hope that anyone would even show because it was the same night as the ball but we were packed and most people stayed until the end which was awesome. I decided to get the ladies (and a couple gentlemen) drunk by playing the drinking game 'Never Have I Ever.' Let me tell you, these women were freaks! One woman in her 60s told us about the time she had sex while stowing away on a freight train. Sweet.

However, the most fun came when Delinda read aloud from one of her books and had two people in the audience act out what she was saying. There is a video out there and as soon as I can find it, I'll send out a link. The woman, Jackie and the guy, Sam really gave us quite the performance. And at the end, they basically made out for real. It was so much fun.

I also got invited to join the Denver fetish community by a woman who shares her man with another woman. Ah, polyamory! She told me that judging from some of my answers the previous night at Sexcapades, she thinks I would be an ideal candidate. I thanked her, not knowing what to say to that but oddly flattered. I told her that I did have a story in mind that involved a BDSM and they very generously offered to educate me which was great and I do plan to take them up on it.

I won't say the conference wasn't without its flaws. For one, the setup for the book signing was weird. You bought your books up front and then went to this back room to have it signed. This did not work. Like I did not know Julia Quinn was there and I love her books and I was going to buy her new one but decided against it. I would have purchased it had I known she was going to be there.

Another thing was the food. I didn't but the meal tickets and I'm glad I didn't cuz I would've been pissed if I spent $35 on the one meal I got. The only reason I got the ticket was because Nicole Peeler gave it to me because she was out being wined and dined by her publisher and eating freeze dried ice cream and root beer from a giant syringe (her story not mine). The food I had was awful and wasn't even the menu they'd advertised. I should've known about the food because the hotel used to be a Holiday Inn where my company used to hold their Christmas parties and the food wasn't good even then. So the decor got better and the food got even worse if that's possible.

The other thing I didn't like was the location. It was near the airport in a part of town that was mostly warehouses. I know it was probably cheaper to hold the conference there but I kind of wish it was in a nicer part of town that was more accessible to all the fun stuff in town. I offered to show people around and give them a taste of Denver but no one took me up on my offer.

Despite that, I think the conference was amazing. I can't wait to do it again. I'm so glad they're keeping it in Denver and I have my fingers crossed that we'll one day attract Nora Roberts.

And now for some photographs!

I promised Jackie I wouldn't tell anyone how I got her and Sam to kiss but let's just say she wanted it. Bad!

The crowd from Midnight. This night was fucking crazy fun! We engaged in all sorts of wickedness and I got people drunk which was really more of a privilege than a duty. I just hope no one has pictures of me with the glow in the dark penis.

Jackie and I after the conference. We're both tired as shit which is why we look like it!

Me and Christine Feehan! It was so cool that I got a chance to chat with her for like five minutes. She was crazy nice!

That's right! Me and Nalini Singh! Jealous?
She is so freaking sweet and her accent is so cute. I think it's fair to say I have a pretty big girl crush!

Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Man I Wanna Hump Day!

So I don't watch "True Blood" but many of my Twitter mates do. The past few days, the Twitterverse has been all a-twitter (har har) with the name Alcide. Being the curious gal that I am, I decided to put my Google skills to use and I found the man of all my newest fantasies.


How did I not know about this man? Where has he been all my life? How long before I can see him naked? I wish it were now.

Sorry! I was lost in a fantasy. If YOU don't know Manganiello, oh honey, you really, really, REALLY need to!!!

He even looks good in clothes!!!

Friday, June 18, 2010

Guest Blogger: Jessa Slade!!!

If you read this blog, you know Monica Kaye appreciates a fine hero. So I thought I’d share some of my inspiration for my dark heroes, written and unwritten.

I love tortured heroes. Dark pasts. Broken hearts. Wounded souls. With honed and burnished bodies, of course, although a few scars are unavoidable, what with the torturing and all.

This picture works for almost all my heroes. And not just because of the chest. I’ve always liked black and white photography. I took a b&w photography class (back in the days of dark room development) and the instructor told us a good print had at least one point of true black and a point of purest white. Sounds like a perfect dark hero, doesn’t it? Black and whites can be so stark, yet so revealing. Just like the best dark heroes. Despite the shadows in a dark hero, you always know exactly what you’re getting: a man...

Oh, sorry, lost my train of thought for a moment. You get a man who doesn’t give up, doesn’t give in, doesn’t give a damn...until he meets you—I mean, the heroine. In the heroine, he meets his match. And by match, I mean the woman who challenges him and who is his other half and who sets him on fire.

Well, those sexy scars had to come from somewhere.

Looking through my stash of eye candy, I found a lot of pix with deep shadows. Not surprising, I guess, since my books are all about shadows. The heroes of my Marked Souls books, SEDUCED BY SHADOWS (Book 1) and FORGED OF SHADOWS (Book 2, out this month) are alpha male warriors possessed by repentant demons. So yeah, they’re shadowed, inside and out.

They walk a sharp line between damnation and redemption and carry sharp blades to ensure they always end up on the right side of that line. If occasionally the line gets a little blurry, that’s just because of all the malignant demon guts on the edge of the blade.

Not that all my pictures are dark. See? This one has all sorts of sunlight behind him.But he still has those wonderful dark locks and dark, dark eyes and OMG actual dark chest hair (but not too much)! Swoon!

But he’s not facing the light. Nope, my dark heroes are resistant to the light. They’re like SPF 101. But love has a way of sneaking through the cracks in their armor. Or maybe just the cracks in their shirts. Dark heroes frequently have unbuttoned shirts.It’s a syndrome or something.

Lighting a dark hero—like properly lighting a photographic subject—can be tricky. A little firelight, or should I say firefight, shows them in action. A little candlelight shows them in a moment of romantic passion. The misty light of the moon gives them mystery while the cold, hard light of day reveals them. Or maybe they show best by flashlight, reading a book under the covers late at night.

All my dark heroes get their day in the sun, of course. That’s what happy endings are for. And speaking of happy endings, doesn’t Liam have a cute butt?

Who is your favorite dark hero and why? Leave a comment and you’ll be entered for a chance to win a copy of Book 1 or Book 2 of the Marked Souls. Not sure which one you want? You can read the opening chapters of both books at

Sunday, June 6, 2010


Just because...

Monday, May 31, 2010

Memorial Day Man Meet

It's Memorial Day. A time where we remember our men and women in uniform who fight for our country and their loved ones. We are truly grateful for your sacrifice and service.

I've always wanted to marry a Marine. There's just something about them that makes all my girlie parts tingle.

Anyhoo, in order to celebrate my way, I present some soldier hotties!


Friday, May 28, 2010

Twitter: Like IM only public

Hello Readers!
As you may have noticed, I am suspiciously absent from my blog. Part of it is laziness and part of it is because I seem to spend every waking hour of the day on Twitter. (Follow me at MonicaKaye!)

I love Twitter. It's a great way to communicate and it's perfect for me because I always have random bits of shit in my mind that my mouth (or fingers) feels compelled to spit out. Twitter is quick, it's easy, and it's fun. When I write a blog, it takes WAY more of my time and thought process because I really want this blog to be entertaining. With my Tweets, if I'm funny 50% of the time, it works for me.

I also love that so many of my friends and author peeps are on Twitter. Writing is solitary and Twitter is a way to get that intstant gratification. I love watching people's conversations. Some should probably be kept private but the fact that they're available for all to see is both hilarious and odd. I mean the same thing could probably be accomplished with an IM program but where's the fun in that?

So if you're looking for more of me, your best best would be to follow me on Twitter. I'm there and it's like you're actually talking to me...but not.

And now, because I've so neglected you, here's something to make you pee your pants!

Friday, May 14, 2010

OUR Mr. Romance 2010

So I asked fan favorite Mr. Romance contestant, Andrew Shaffer, to do a guest blog for Harmless Smut about his experience in the Mr. Romance mangeant. He was clearly a fan favorite. As different from the other contestant as pizza is from asparagus But he stole our hearts with his charm and wit and humor. And he's quite cute despite his lack of the six-pack abs that permeate the mangeant.

I did a happy dance as elaborate as anything on ABDC when he agreed to do a blog for me. I think he's grateful for my great connections! I did, after all, introduce him to SB Sarah. Cuz that's how I do! He was so grateful, he even sent a shirtless pic!


All right, all right, I know you're done reading me. You want The Man himself. Here he is... (and a funny mother fucker at that!)

My Right Breast”

by Andrew Shaffer (

While some of the other contestants brought their own topless photos to hand out and sign for fans (and I use the term “fans” loosely here), I inadvertently left mine at home. Let this be a lesson to all budding authors out there – never go to a conference without a stack of glossy beefcake photos of yourself. As soon as I officially entered the 2010 Mr. Romance contest, a photographer was immediately assigned to me to take publicity shots.

The photographer, a former Mr. Romance contestant himself, ushered me to an empty staircase and indoor patio inside the Columbus convention center. “We’ll take the shots here,” he said, squinting into the late afternoon sunlight coming through the convention center’s tall windows. “The shadows should give you some definition.” His wife joined us as a lookout to keep our makeshift studio clear of interlopers.

The first shots that we took were of me in my suit. Close-up headshots and a few of me talking on a cellphone. Thankfully, no one had interrupted us. “Now take your shirt off,” the photographer said.

I winced. After taking one last look around for gawkers, I slipped out of my suit jacket and began unbuttoning my shirt at lightning speed. I’d never gotten undressed so quickly in my life before -- and that includes when I lost my virginity. The photographer’s wife took my clothes and looked me up and down. “You’re pretty white,” she said. Of course I am. Show me a writer with a tan, and I’ll show you a writer who doesn’t spend enough time at their keyboard.

The photographer directed me to sit at a table, which was meant to hide my love handles. I sat as upright as possible and puffed my chest out. “That sort of looks like a pec,” his wife said, pointing to my left breast. “But the other one…” She scrunched her face up. Apparently -- and this was the first time that anyone had ever pointed this out to me – my right boob is a little, well, saggy. “It’s okay,” the photographer said, picking up an orphaned newspaper from a nearby table. “Just hold this in front of it.”

He snapped the photos quickly. The session wasn’t any more invasive or painful than walking through airport security. The photographer carefully scrutinized the photos on the digital camera’s display while I waited impatiently at the table sans shirt. He finally gave me a thumbs-up. “You can get dressed,” he said.

Thank God that’s over, I thought as I buttoned my dress shirt. Little did I know that my journey had just begun. Any modesty that I had left was sandblasted away by the dance routine later that week when I ripped my shirt off onstage in front of hundreds of screaming fans.

Wednesday, May 12, 2010


This is me and Mr. Romance 2009, Charles Paz. He loves a sista!

Just because...

Victoria Dahl, showing off "The Shirt!" Yes, folks, that is half-naked women riding wolves, shooting uzis, and gnawing on raw meat. Of course, being the person I am, I assumed the women were anally raping the wolves.

Oh, the Heavenly Night of Rock Band and everyone sitting enraptured as Mark Henry (not shown) reads aloud from an erotic romance. Good times!

Monday, May 10, 2010

RT WRAP 2010

No, I'm not dead...

I've just been in lazy mode. I need to get writing and editing and submitting. But in the meantime, I did find the time to party!

I love RT. It's just a really fun place to meet readers, take some workshops, and best of all, stalk your favorite authors. Like I did. With Lora Leigh. But more about that later. The best part is I got to spend some QT with my good friend, Helen Hardt.

So, I get there Tuesday night (after being at work for a half day, never doing that shit again) and the first thing I do is go to the bar. (Of course!) The hotel is packed with morticians, and Christians, and perverts, oh my! The first person I see is another friend, Liz Pelletier, who is drink off her ass with her friend, Dawn McClure, and new on my list of awesome peeps, Jessa Slade. Helen goes off and smiles and flirts with the morticians for free drinks and I'm getting drunk and touching on Mr. Romance 2009, my bud, Charles Paz. All in all, a great 1st night.

But the next day is when it all begins... After waking up (late), Helen and I go to breakfast and just happen to run into Mr. Romance, Charles (by now I'm sure he's stalking me) and we have a lovely meal. It was enlightening as hell, such as the info that Mr. Romance only had 3 contestants. 3 CONTESTANTS? What is this? Victorian England? Where are my half-naked men to fondle? To dance with? To hear say that they would 'fuck the shit' out of me? (NOTE: Not making this up, happened last year. Not to me, but to my friend. But I heard it and yeah, it was hot.)

That bummed the shit out of me, especially considering I knew one of the contestants and was not a fan. He was hot but not a nice guy. A fact that Helen can attest to.

At this point, all I can do is drown my sorrows in sex... Sex on the beach that is. It seemed to be the drink of the convention. Or at least my little part of it. Delicious vodka and cherries will put any girl in a good mood.

As for the parties? First up, the EC ball. Paint the town Red. I even bought a red dress for the occasion. One which promptly got whole in it. That shit always happens to me. On the plus side, it made a killer shirt and my sweater concealed the tear so in true ghetto fashion, I was all good. I got better when the EC cavemen but on their show. Not quite a strip show, but I'm a writer, I have a great imagination so it was no trouble at all to go from half-naked to the full monty in my imagination. There was one caveman, Kruz, who literally made my mouth water. He knew how to move his ass and the man touched himself almost as much as I wanted to touch him. Literally. The man grabbed his junk every few seconds as if he wasn't entirely sure it was going to be there. I think one of my RT buddies has a pic with me and him. I might need some alone time with it. All and all the EC party was campy fun.

Next came the fairy ball. Nothing much to say here. Most of the men had gone and I wore fairy wings. Oh, and there was dinner and dancing. The food wasn't nearly as bad as last year but it was banquet food. Take from it was you will.

The next night is the vampire ball. Heather Graham and all of her family and friends but on quite the campy show. It's part musical, part train wreck, all awesome. Shayne, Heather's son and friend from last year, made his acting debut. Let me tell you, the man was made

The final night was the Dorchester party. Which, I didn't go to cuz I was out being wined and dined by editors! Not really but I did get the hook up from my new BFF Victoria Dahl who invited me to dinner with her, Angela James of Carina Press, Kristin Sevick and Melissa Frain, both Tor editors. It was the first time I'd left the hotel, which I found out later was a shame because there was something called the North Market that I should have given my left nut to eat at. Ah, well.

As you can imagine, I wowed the editors with my sparkling and witty conversation. Especially when I talked about Bobby Brown helping Whitney Houston out with her constipation by going on a digging expedition. Yeah, that's how I roll.

But it was by far the best night because it was the night I met Mark Henry, hung out with the amazing Jaye Wells, and was treated to dramatic erotic readings by Mark, Heather Osborn, and Stacia Kane. Abso-fucking-lutely awsome! I mean I wish someone could have videotaped that. It was all red, weeping cocks, Organs of Dominion, and mmmfgrrr! It was a night I cannot wait to experience again. I'm wondering if I can convince them to put together a skype conference call once a month. I'm going to start working on that.

Another highlight, was the Mr. Romance competition. I'm just going to give you the highlights. For a more snarky analysis, you can go to Twitter and search #mangeant. There you will find colorful commentary from myself as well as Mark Henry. (Side note: The mangeant brings people to together. It's how Mark Henry and I discovered each other. I'd been trying to catch his attention for a while cuz I follow him on Twitter and FB and think he's one funny muthafucka. That he now thinks the same about me? Priceless!)

Anyhoo, by the time the mangeant rolled around, three contestants had jumped to six. There was DeLonn, a very nice (and I imagine very hungry) young man. There was Jamie, a sweet but shy guy. He was nice looking and that's all I have to say about him. There was Franco, last year's runner up. Antonio, a stripper and one of the EC cavemen. Some other guy who's name escapes me (that should tell you something). And ANDREW. By far, the crowd favorite. He was not your typical mangeant contestant. He's a published author and all-around fun and witty guy. He's looking to write romance novels. He wants his name, as well as his face, on the cover of books. Gotta love a man who loves romance. I imagine hearts all over the place broke when they were introduced to his extremely lovely wife. Yeah, I'd like to have been a fly on the wall for that conversation. "But honey, it's my JOB to flirt with all those hundreds of women!" I got to introduce in him Smart Bitch Sarah and there was a lot of mutual admiration going on. SB Sarah remembered me from last year which gave me another case of the squees. Girl crush!

Some highlights for me: meeting Lora Leigh, whom I LOVE!!! I was on the verge of stalking her until I met her Thursday night. She was more than a little tipsy and more than a little awesome. She's one of the sweetest people. I still pinch myself that I got to hang with Victoria Dahl. As some of you may remember, I wrote a review of her book, Talk Me Down. She's just as cool in person as I imagined her to be from her books and her inappropriate tweets. Plus there was meeting Jessa and Dawn, hanging out with Liz and Helen, and the sex...on the beach. Oh, and Jackie Frank looks SO GOOD. Very happy and super healthy. She practically glowed. And she gave me a copy of Stealing Kathryn. She's the shit.

There was also a bookfair. I bought too many books. Victoria Dahl dared someone to yell 'ballz' in the middle of the event. Being the kind of girl I am, I obliged. And got an ARC of her newest historical. I also betrayed my race by not buying a book and supporting another sista. With that in mind, I am announcing my entry into the Caucasian race. Gifts and money will be greatly welcome.

All in all, a great conference. I did go to some workshops. I got to be in the same room as J.R. Ward (another fucking funny as hell lady!). This was my first time as a published author and it wasn't what I expected but I'll be better prepared next time. I always say that I'm not going next year but by the end of it, I'm always looking forward to it. I love being able to talk about the books I read, love meeting the authors that write them, and maybe someday, I will have my own merry band of fans who've come to meet me and get me to sign something of theirs. (For the record, I'm not opposed to writing on tits. Just sayin'.)

That would be cool.

Monday, February 15, 2010

Man Meet Monday: Enrique Iglesias

Happy Presidents' Day!!

I know that you are all so excited to celebrate the holiday. Pfft!

Anyhoo, I am knee-deep into a story. YAY!!! I need to get my ass in gear. Maybe Valentine's Day will inspire me.

Or maybe Enrique will.

This guy is HOT!!! I seriously want to lick him. And lick him. And bite him. I have s sneaking suspicion he tastes like caramel. If you couldn't tell, he totally does it for me. I have been in lust with him since 'Bailamos' came out ten years ago. Even now, he gives me the tinglies. I wish I saw more of him. (Literally!) I even forgive him his Anna Kournakova stint. Every man needs to get that out of his system.

I was actually heartbroken when he had the mole removed from his face. I thought that was one of the sexiest things I'd ever seen. That just goes to show you how much I do love him. Who else can claim a mole is sexy? Unless they're Cindy Crawford.

Fortunately for me, the internet is rife with shirtless pictures of the man of my dream. And I am generous enough to share him with you all.



Monday, February 1, 2010

Man Meet Monday: Josh Duhamel

Welcome to February! I thought that I would start the week and the month off right with some Monday morning hotness.

Josh Duhamel first got his start as a model before moving on to acting with his role as Leo du Pres on All My Children. Since then he has transitioned into a genuine Hollywood leading man with roles in Win a Date with Tad Hamilton, Transformers,and more recently When in Rome.

Unfortunately, he is married but who cares about that.

The best part? LOTS of photos of a half-naked, hot-as-hell, Josh.


Friday, January 22, 2010

Lia Slater


As you're probably able to tell, I am interrupting First Sale Friday to bring you the lowdown on an awesome book by an awesome person.

Please welcome my friend and critique partner, Lia Slater!

Hi Monica! Thanks for inviting me over and letting me talk about my latest release, WereSlave. It’s an erotic paranormal romance, the first story in a werewolf series. And it’s available now from Ellora’s Cave.


As the Queen of Paqualette, Nayla is forbidden to have a husband or a human lover. Her life is a lonely and disciplined existence, so when she’s given the opportunity to choose a Were from her dungeon as her sex slave, she takes a chance. Werewolves, she knows, are nothing but senseless monsters, but after the one she selects to be her WereSlave turns out to be more of a man than she’s ever known, she must question her beliefs.

As the alpha leader, Mace is responsible for his pack. He’ll do anything to keep them alive, even give into the Queen’s sexual demands. But not unless he’s in control. Turning his enticing captor into the submissive is the only way to show her he’s more man than she realizes. Falling in love is out of the question, but so is leaving her behind.


Nayla shoved at his chest again but, of course, he wouldn’t budge. He was solid steel. More than a man, he was a Were. A fact that surprisingly heated her insides. He was strong. Unrelenting. Powerful. Demanding. Untamable. And hers.

But would she allow herself to be tamed by him?


He grabbed her wrists and kept her from repeating the action, which infuriated her even more. How dare he try to confine her?

“Let me go right this instant, Mace Quinton.”

“Not until we have this little argument settled,” he said through gritted teeth. His bold blue eyes glinted with determination.

“There’s nothing to settle.” She jerked her hands in an attempt to escape but it was ineffective. He held her tight.

“Stop fighting me, Nayla. I want you and you will be mine. Outside your castle walls. Outside your country’s watchful eyes. You will give in to me.” He moved on top of her and wedged himself between her thighs.

Though her heart and body wanted to concede, her temper rose. She wouldn’t be forced to do anything. She squirmed and kicked and nearly pulled her hands free.

“Stop.” He readjusted his grip on her wrists and pinned them to the ground above her head. “Stop, Nayla.” His voice softened as well as his expression. “I don’t wish to fight you. You’re weak from the trek and I’m deeply sorry for that. But this battle must end.”

“I didn’t start—”

“Nayla, love,” he whispered in her ear so sweetly, she had to take in a breath.

“I’m listening.”

“Let me have you. Please.”

Her heart drummed a beat so loud it reached her head. He was right. She was too tired to fight. And a large part of her didn’t want to anymore.

Not when his warm lips pressed against her neck. Not when his tongue licked her thumping pulse. Certainly not when the weight of his cock sat solidly against her pussy, making her body react. Wetness pooled between her thighs and her nerves tingled with anticipation.

One glance around the cave assured her no one could see them from the outside. They had their privacy, their own hideaway. There was no one to witness her submission. No one to see the Queen yielding to her WereSlave.

This is a GREAT book peeps. GO BUY IT!!!

Buy link:

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Man Meet Tuesday: Men with Accents

So this is a day late and I apologize for that. I've been sick for two days and I'm only now feeling better. I've decided to celebrate my recent wellness with some hot man meat. Specifically a month of men with accents.

I've gotten into this show "Secret Diary of a Call Girl" and there are two really hot dudes that I want to share with you. The first you may remember from "The Tudors."


Alas, I couldn't find any good pics of him shirtless but his face more than makes up for it.


Friday, January 15, 2010

First Sale Friday: Wren Boudreau

Welcome to another installment of First Sale Friday. Today, Harmless Smut is pleased to welcome Wren Boudreau. Wren is a fellow Loose Id author that I met on the boards and begged to have on the blog.

HS: First of all, thanks for visiting Harmless Smut!

WB: THANKS for having me!!!!

HS: First of all, how long have you been writing?

WB: I guess I've been writing on and off since I was a kid. In terms of writing, um, professionally, "Ice Cream on the Side" is my very first book.

HS: LOVE that title! What attracted you to writing romance?

WB: I discovered m/m three years ago or so. Kind of stumbled upon it and wow - I was hooked immediately. Something about the dynamics of two men in a relationship really spoke to me as a reader, and I devoured a lot of books. I experienced the wonderful spectrum of quality that exists in these books. Periodically I’d say to myself, “Hey, I could do better than this.” (Then I’d read something by Josh Lanyon, or Jordan Castillo Price, or JL Langley, and I’d say, “Nah. It’s not that easy. I’ll just keep reading.”)

Then in late 2008 I stumbled across a contest a publisher was having. I literally wrote the book in a month’s time (my own private nanowrimo). Every entry was supposed to get editorial feedback, which I thought was great, since I didn’t have any beta readers or critique partners and lord knew I couldn’t ask my rl friends to review because holy crap the book has man on man sex in it! I just looked at it as a chance to see if I could write something others might want to read.

Well, I never heard back from the publisher, except for the automated we-got-your-document response. So I wallowed in bitterness and anger for a while then segued into self-pity and finally acceptance that I probably suck as a writer. A few months later, don’t know what possessed me, but I opened up the story file and re-read my book and thought, “This needs a lotta work. But it isn’t too awful.” So I revised. And sent the synopsis and three chapters to one of my favorite publishers, Loose Id.

Lo and behold! They wanted to see the whole dang thing! And after they read it, well, wonder of wonders, they wanted to publish it. And, la, here it is!

HS: That's awesome. I also got my big break from a contest. Loose Id rocks! How many manuscripts had you completed before you sold?

WB: Just the one. Neat-o, huh?

HS: That's flippin' amazing! Double congrats! Tell us about the day (the minute, the second) you received "The Call" (or email). What was your initial reaction?

WB: I’d been waiting…and waiting…a couple of emails back and forth with the editor I was working with at Loose Id gave me the sense that I would hear from management soon. One part of me felt pretty confident, because the editor had thought it good enough to send on up the ladder. Another part of me felt very unsure and kept coming up with little pep talks: It’ll be okay, maybe you’ll get some insights into what needs to change. There are other publishers to try. If you get rejected it’s not you personally they’re rejecting. Et cetera.

My husband and I were off on a cruise! So I had my laptop with me (‘cause y’know I had to be able to keep in touch with my college-age son in case of emergency, right?) and sure enough, while cruising off the coast of the U.K. I received the email that said “Welcome to Loose Id!” I read that a couple times to be sure I wasn’t hallucinating. Then I did the “hey guess what” thing with my husband. Did the happy dance. Smiled a lot.

HS: That's a great story! What did you do to celebrate after?

WB: We went to dinner at the nicest restaurant on the ship - the one where you have to pay extra. Had Asti Spumante (my fav) and talked about how cool it was that my book was going to be published.

HS: Nice way to celebrate. Anyone whom you wanted to rub their nose in it?

WB: Oh, it sounds so petty, but yeah, that first publishing company that never followed up. I got over that quickly, though.

HS: Success will do that for you! Tell us about your current release.

WB: “Ice Cream on the Side” was released on Dec. 8. It’s on the Loose Id website:


Dylan Forest is really pretty happy. He’s a successful architect, lives in a great little town, and has good friends. More than ten years ago, Dylan’s first boyfriend betrayed him. Since then he’s learned to appreciate men briefly and intensely, with no lingering complications. But Dylan finds himself wanting something more with Michael Gilmore, the new art teacher in town.

Michael moved to Raven Pass to get away after a bad break-up. He just wants to teach and he’s got an exhibit of his own work coming up. He doesn’t expect to find himself attracted to anyone just yet. He has to give up his fear so he can explore a possible relationship with Dylan.

The guys manage to get past their insecurities and into bed, where they find out just how compatible they are. Before their romance gains momentum, however, life gets complicated. An old dead body and a new murder are both connected to Dylan’s love life, and it appears that Michael will be next.

What’s going on? And can Dylan and Michael stop it before it stops them?


The pile from the backpack was an interesting assortment of things: tins of charcoals and pastels, pencils of different sizes, crumpled papers, an orange, several sketch pads, an iPod, headphones, tubes of acrylics, a six-inch wooden manikin, and a notebook computer.

The whole thing reminded me of Mary Poppins’s carpetbag. “If I stuck my arm in your backpack, would I pull up a hat rack?”

He didn’t bat an eye. “No, but you might get a floor lamp.”

Michael used the computer to make notes and write an outline of our plan. His fingers flew over the keyboard. When I tried to think, my eyes were drawn to his hands, and thoughts of architecture were replaced with thoughts of what those hands would feel like… I had to get up and move around the room in order to speak coherent sentences.

Eventually, my stomach pointed out that I hadn’t eaten yet by growling loud enough to be heard in New Jersey. Michael stopped typing and tilted his head to listen.

“Sorry,” I said. “Snack time?”

“Good idea.” He closed the laptop, set it off to the side, and stretched his arms toward the ceiling. My mouth watered when his stretch exposed a strip of skin at the bottom of his shirt. I turned rapidly toward the fridge and stuck my head in, hoping the cold would wash all the way to my cock.

“Do you feel like veggies and dip, or chips and salsa?” I yelled from the bowels of my Amana.

“Definitely chips and salsa.” His voice sounded from right next to me, and I nearly gave myself a concussion when I jumped. My scowl was lost on him; he only grinned at me when I straightened up. I handed him the salsa, and he poured it in a bowl while I dumped the chips into a basket. We each grabbed another beer and returned to the table, sitting at the far end away from the mass of papers strewn about. Michael turned his chair to face out toward the deck. Our conversation turned from our project to other topics.

I discovered, among other things, that he was originally from western Pennsylvania, had two sisters and a brother, graduated from my alma mater -- Penn State -- with a major in art education and a minor in graphic design, and at twenty-six, was six years younger than me. He learned that I was born not far from right here, my mother died when I was ten, my favorite thing to do was design buildings and landscapes, and gardening was a stress-relieving hobby.

I was just about to ask him about the kind of music he liked when I noticed a glop of salsa at the corner of his mouth. “You’ve got some, um, salsa, there.” I tried to point without pointing, to, you know, be polite.

“Where?” He rubbed at the wrong side of his mouth.

“No, the other side.”

He wiped a spot on his cheek. “Did I get it?”

“Here,” I said and scooped the offending sauce off with my thumb, which somehow then ended up in his mouth.

I watched with fascination as he sucked gently, pulling the digit in, swirling his tongue around it, his eyes closed as if this were the best thing he’d ever tasted. My other fingers rested on his face, feeling the suction through his cheek. He pulled back and opened his eyes; I got lost in them for a minute. When I moved my hand to the back of his neck and drew him to me, he gave no resistance. Our lips met, flavored with salt and salsa. We shared a series of little kisses, tasting each other gently.

He had turned his chair around, and we sat facing each other. His hands rested on my biceps, and my hands slid to his chest -- where they noticed that Michael did have more interesting piercings.

The soft little kisses grew stronger. The more I had, the more I wanted.

Without moving his lips away, Michael said, “I’ve wanted to kiss you since I met you.”

“So kiss me,” I mumbled back.

I caught his tongue with mine and sucked on it, a hopeful foreshadowing of events to follow. He pulled on my bottom lip with his teeth. The frenzy meter ratcheted up, our lips and tongues exploring, probing, claiming. I felt his hand in my hair, and my own hand twisted his shirt. Breathing became a secondary need, behind tasting. When air proved to be necessary, we slid back into short, small kisses. It didn’t take long for me to feel refreshed, and I plunged back into kissing him deeply, rolling my tongue across and under his teeth. He groaned when I held his face between my palms and bit lightly at his lips. He tried to take back control, but I couldn’t get enough of tasting him.

His tug on my hair pulled me away enough to look in his eyes. “Dylan,” he whispered.

“Shh,” I said. “A moment.” We were still, just breathing, and I could feel the reverberation of each kiss.

He gave me that moment; then he leaned back. “Wow.” His hands slipped away from my shoulders as he stood up. He walked to the sliding glass door and leaned against the jamb, staring out across the hills. This did not seem like a good sign to me. I didn’t know if I should follow or back away. I opted for the middle road, stood up but stayed near my chair.

He turned toward me.

“I…that was…” He shook his head. “I’ve never been kissed like that.”

“That makes two of us. Why are you over there?”

He looked out the window again. “I’m overwhelmed. This wasn’t what I expected.”

“Is that a good thing or a bad thing?”

“Neither. Both. I’m not sure.” He crossed the room to where his belongings were piled. “I have to go… I need to think.”

“Michael, no. I want you to stay.” This time I did follow him, stopping just within reach.
He threw his things into the backpack. I grabbed his hands to hold them still. “Listen. I maybe didn’t do this right. I moved too fast.” He stared up at me, waiting. “I like you, and I don’t want to screw this up.” I thought about the different men I’d been with and how everything with them happened so fast because there was so little time for it. I realized I was walking new ground, here. “I’m sorry I scared you.”

He clenched my hands. “No…don’t…I think I scared myself. You remember I told you about the relationship I’d been in?”

I nodded.

“When I left, I promised myself that I would not jump into another one. I can’t do things part way.” He let go of me, and his pacing emphasized the words he spoke quietly. “Tim -- my ex -- and I, we were together almost a year, and I completely misread him. I was so excited about our being together -- I was looking at houses and furniture, but he was looking at other men. Our arguments left me realizing that I expected too much -- made too many big plans. Tim said some cruel things to me, but he made me think about not only ours, but other relationships I’d been in. I leap too quickly. I can’t trust myself.” He stopped moving, shrugged, and gave a little unhappy laugh. “My mom used to tell me I was too passionate about, well, everything. My brother used to tell me I was a nervous breakdown waiting to happen.”

He suddenly looked so very young. I felt like a lecher. I wanted to rewind back to where we were building a friendship. Before I could say anything, he continued.

“I thought I’d learned my lesson, but you were so unexpected. And it threw me.”

I’ve been called a lot of things, but “unexpected” was a new one. “I’m not sure I’m following you.”

His pacing brought him to the opposite side of the table. He leaned on it. “I never expected that I would find anyone like you in this place. You’re smart. Funny. Kind. Gorgeous. I’ve been thinking about that kiss for so long, I was sure the reality would never live up to the fantasy. I was wrong. It was better.”

I stood speechless. No one had ever said anything like that to me. I replayed his words in my head a few times so I wouldn’t forget them.

A sigh came from deep in his chest as he shoved his belongings into his bag. “It scares the shit out of me.” He zipped up the backpack and headed to the front door.

I tried to shake off the fog that was swirling around my head and stopped him with my hand on his arm. “Wait. Can’t we work through this together?”

“I just need a little time. I don’t want to go into anything blinded by my fantasies. And I don’t want to ruin something with exploding baggage before it begins.” A look of fear passed over his face. “Oh, God, have I ruined it already?”

I was too flummoxed to answer anything with conviction. “No, no, you haven’t ruined it. I think we both have baggage we need to unpack.”

Michael gave me a shaky smile and reached up to kiss me on the cheek. As he opened the door and stepped out, he said, “I will call you. I know that sounds stupid, but I promise I will.”

Before I could think of anything else to say, he was gone.

HS: Whew! Excuse me for a sec...

I'm back! Tell me you're working on something now!

WB: I’m in the very, very beginning stages of a new m/m romance. It may have shape-shifters of the wolfy kind. A tortured alpha male, a sweet beta boy. I don’t want to say more because I have learned that what you start out with may not be what you end up with!

HS: Wolves? I'm in! Any advice for the "Soon to be Published"?

WB: Read. A lot. Get a sense of what you like and what you don’t like. Read reviews of books in the genre you’re going to write in. Notice the differences of opinion between reviewers and hone in on the constructive criticisms they offer. I never really thought too much about why I liked or didn’t like a book until I started reading reviews. The really good reviewers give valid, well-thought-out reasons for their opinions, which made me look closer at the books I was reading and gave me new insights. Start writing. I am a first-class procrastinator, which is why it took a contest to get me moving - that provided the deadline I needed. So if you need one of those, make something up! Just write.

HS: Great advice! Now for some fun stuff! Tell us something about you that would surprise us.

WB: I am seriously shy. In my senior year of high school I was in a very small seminar class. Near the end of the year, in the midst of a discussion about our particular personalities, one of my classmates leaned toward me and said, “All this time I thought you were stuck up! And it’s just that you’re shy!” It suddenly was clear to me why I’d had such a hard time making friends. *sigh* I’m not much better at it now, but at least I know what’s going on! And on the interwebz, nobody knows you’re shy…or whatever.

HS: Gotta love the internet! Boxers or briefs on your man?

WB: Why limit oneself?

HS: Good point! Who's your ideal hero?

WB: I’ve always (well, at least since 1977) been partial to Han Solo. I still swoon if I happen to come across the very first Star Wars.

HS: If you could have sex with one celebrity, who would it be?

WB: Hugh Jackman…wait…George Clooney…. Alexander Skarsgard….hold on…Gilles Marini…no..Ryan Reynolds. Oh crap, I’ll have to try them all. I’ll get back to you.

HS: What's the funniest or most interesting line you've ever read in a book or written?

WB: There are a bajillion in Jim Butcher’s Harry Dresden books.

Here’s just one, from “Death Masks”:

Susan: “Elevator?”

Harry: “Stairs, if they have them. If someone shoots at us on stairs, we can scream and flail around a lot more."

HS: Good one! Facial hair or no? Chest hair? No hair on any part of the body (your partner, of course, not you)?

WB: Glad you made it clear this wasn’t about me! Not super keen on facial hair, but a closely cropped bit is okay. Some body hair is acceptable, but not furry (unless he’s a shifter and he’s…shifted) because then when you get to the licking part the loose hairs stick to your tongue and then there is that awkward moment where you have to fish hairs out of your mouth or worse yet they get caught in your throat. But long hair (on his head, I mean) trumps all. I am so a sucker for the long-haired boy. *Sigh*

HS: Great answers! Thanks, Wren, for joining us here at Harmless Smut!

What are you waiting for, readers? GO BUY!!

Later Gators!